Get back to where you once belonged

I visited California for work last week. I always have the same feeling when I travel: I can't wait to get back to Kansas. It's just home.

But this was a good morning.

And I visited UC Santa Barbara, which has a pretty good location.

And I got back in time for Kansas day and a great party, inappropriate "Toby moments" and the shining faces of my family.

California is a fine place to visit, but Kansas is home.

In the city

It's not the people in the city-at least I don't think it is. It's more the cars and the never-ending potential to be hit by one. When stuck in traffic on the freeway, I feel trapped by the knowledge that thousands upon thousands of cars stand between me and open air; between me and space. I'm not one to get claustrophobic, but that about puts me over the edge.

I was thinking while driving through a high mountain pass on Highway 5 to get to Los Angeles that the sea and the mountains (in such close proximity here) each have their own distinct call. I've always heard the sea more clearly and I think I know why. The sea, like the prairie, works hand-in-hand with the sky; one just melts in to the other. So I suppose I understand why the poet in the psalm lifted eyes to the mountains as a tangible example of larger than life majesty, but my help comes from the sky. In the sky is the reflection of depth and beauty that should be the goal of humanity. In the sea and the plain exist a deliberate and steadfast march to the sky, contrasting with the mountains' tumultuous struggle to climb there and overcome it.

I long to be amongst you all again, and to take your arms as we guide our children to the sky.

Be well.

A whole new world, a dazzling place I never knew...

Our new front room. We're quite proud.

New paint, new sofa, new loveseat.

The existence of an item of furniture called the loveseat basically

strongarms parents in to having the sex talk.

Our new front room. We're quite proud.

Beard cultivation

21st century, 1st decade

Thanks to Allison for this inspiration


In January of 2000 I was:

-adjusting to the news that I was becoming a father and husband (Technically a husband much sooner than I was functionally a husband. That one took a while.)
-without a vehicle
-living in Emporia, KS
-a renter
-working as a bartender
-a college dropout
-22 years old
-dyeing my hair black
-120 pounds
-a cat-owner
-sporting a goatee
-without goals


In January of 2010, I am:
-father to a 9 year old daughter and a 4 year old son who are my joy and my bane :)
-dedicated to being a partner with my wonderful spouse
-driving a minivan, with a scooter for warm days, and a truck that I can't figure out what to do with.
-living in my hometown of Newton, KS
-a mortgage-payer (not a homeowner, big difference)
-working as a fundraiser for Bethel College
-a college graduate (this still makes me melty happy)
-32 years old (although more often than not I have to think about how old I am before I answer)
-quickly going gray/grey depending on your side of the Atlantic
-160 pounds
-a dog owner
-determined to grow a beard
-driven to make the world a better place, a more tolerant existence